Purple question marks in the background with the Reduce The Stigma logo in the foreground.

Reduce The Stigma: Help Us name Our New Series

Contest to Name the New Reduce The Stigma Series

naming contest reduce the stigma

Mental health, addiction, drug use, recovery, struggle… these topics can be heavy, confusing, and shrouded in stigma. Reduce The Stigma, your favorite podcast for recovery stories, peer specialists, and recovery-oriented organizations, is taking a bold step forward with a brand new series.

Why A New Series?

Meet The Peer and Recovery Conversations have been well-received and we’re so grateful to our audience. We found there was still more we could be doing to reduce stigma. What else can we be doing? Diving even deeper into these tough topics. Sometimes, the most powerful conversations are the raw, honest ones. We all know mental health, use, addiction, and recovery aren’t easy. They’re messy, complex, and often overwhelming. This new series will rip off the bandaid and dive deep, tackling the realities of mental health challenges, substance use, and the stigma that surrounds them.

What to Expect:

  • Live & Interactive: We’re going live! Every episode will be livestreamed, creating a dynamic space for real-time interaction with you, our incredible audience.
  • Peer Power: We’ll be joined by some of your favorite peer specialists, individuals with lived experience who bring invaluable insight and empathy to the conversation.
  • Your Questions Answered: Got something on your mind? Curious to hear a different perspective? Submit your questions for our hosts and guests to tackle head-on.

This isn’t just about sharing stories – it’s about fostering a supportive community where everyone feels empowered to speak their truth. Whether you’re struggling yourself, supporting a loved one, or simply want to learn more, this series is for you.

But We Need Your Help!

To launch this exciting new chapter, we need YOU! We’re hosting a contest to name the show. We’re looking for a title that’s impactful, engaging, and perfectly captures the essence of meaningful conversations about mental health, addiction, and recovery.

  1. Go to Name The New Series to submit your most creative and powerful title suggestions!
  2. Tell all your friends, family, and everyone you can to go vote for your submission! 

The new name and top winner will be announced during our Livestream show 6/25/24 at 8pm ET. 

Prizes

  • All submissions will be entered into a random selection raffle to win one (1) $20 gift card to the SUC/RTS store
  • The 5 submissions with the most votes will receive a RTS T-shirt
  • The submission selected to be the name will win a $50 SUC/RTS gift card and a $30 peer support voucher redeemable on Straight Up Care. The voucher can be transferred to a friend/family member

Stay tuned for more information on the premiere date, guest line-up, and how to tune in live!

Tips for Coming Up With A Name

  • Know the audience: Who is the show trying to reach? Tailor the name to their interests and language.
    • We are trying to reach individuals with lived experience with substance use, mental health, recovery, struggles, all of life’s hard moments. We also want to reach their friends, family, and people in their community.
  • Keep it catchy: Short, memorable titles are easier to recall. Aim for 2-3 words, ideally under 29 characters.
  • Clarity is key: The name should give listeners a hint about the show’s content or tone.
    • Content: Deep, sometimes emotionally-charged and difficult topics.
    • Tone: Laid back and friendly but also serious about helping others.
  • Search friendly: Include relevant keywords to help listeners find the show. But avoid keyword stuffing; prioritize natural-sounding language.
  • Be unique: Check to see if there’s already a popular show with that name. Think about what would catch your attention?
  • Wordplay magic: Puns, alliteration, or rhyme can make the title stand out.
  • Get feedback: Bounce ideas off friends, family, or potential listeners.
  • Say it out loud: Does it roll off the tongue? How would you introduce it?

Follow Straight Up Care

Contest to Name the New Reduce The Stigma Series Mental health, addiction, drug use, recovery, struggle… these topics can be heavy, confusing, and shrouded in stigma. Reduce The Stigma, your favorite podcast for recovery stories, peer specialists, and recovery-oriented organizations, is taking a bold step forward with a brand new series. Why A New Series? […]

Continue reading "Reduce The Stigma: Help Us name Our New Series"
Blue background with Toni Morrison's photo in the center. Logos for Reduce The Stigma and Meet The Peer. Toni discusses healing, helping, recovery and empowerment.

Healing Through Helping: A Story of Recovery and Empowerment

Toni Morrison, Peer Support Specialist | Reduce The Stigma - Meet The Peer

Toni Morrison, peer support specialist on a transparent background
Toni Morrison quote: The hardest thing is pulling yourself, like mentally pulling yourself out of your darkness. It's so hard. It's so hard, but you can do it. On a white background with salmon/orange paint strokes

In this episode of “Meet the Peer,” host Whitney Menarcheck sits down with Toni Morrison, a Peer Support Specialist from South Dakota. Toni shares her powerful journey from battling addiction and facing legal challenges to embracing recovery and becoming a beacon of hope for others. Discover how Toni’s lived experiences and resilience have shaped her into a compassionate peer specialist dedicated to helping others navigate their recovery journeys.

Connect with a peer specialist: https://straightupcare.com

 

Click here for the episode’s full transcript.

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Transcript

Whitney (00:05)

Hello and welcome to Meet the Peer, a special series where we shine the spotlight on peer specialists. Meet the Peer is brought to you by Straight Up Care. With a mission to empower peer recovery professionals, Straight Up Care provides a multi-use platform and resources for peer specialists to share their lived experiences and build a positive connection with those in the recovery community. I’m your host, Whitney Menarcheck, and on this episode of Meet the Peer, we have Toni Morrison, a Certified Peer Specialist in South Dakota. Welcome Toni!

 

Tanya Morrison (00:38)

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you all for having me.

 

Whitney (00:43)

So excited to have you here and I can’t wait to learn more about you. And let’s just start with your lived experience, your journey to today.

 

Tanya Morrison (00:57)

I am in drug court. I had an abusive childhood growing up. I thought I got over that. I had my children and they helped. Children help a lot when you have them. I was with my kids but that’s what got me into active drug addiction. I just, and I lost myself. I lost myself in my addiction. And I was in and out of jail, running away from my warrants. And like, this is what the fifth time was last year, was the fifth time I was in jail because of my warrants, because of my drug use. And I was just tired of it.You know, I wanted to be a mom again. I wanted to be an adult again. And so I decided to go, I decided I was gonna get treatment and get myself better. And so here I am.

 

Whitney (02:13)

Here you are. And you said you are in drug court. Can you give a kind of brief explanation of what that means?

 

Tanya Morrison (02:22)

The drug court is basically like the last resort to either get better or go to prison. And I’m not, I’m from the South Pacific. I’m a Pacific Islander. I was not born in the United States. If I go to prison, I get deported back home. And I can’t have that. I can’t have that for myself. And I mean, my kids are here. And if I go back home, I won’t be able to ever see them for what, 10 years? Um, that wasn’t the only reason why I joined drug courts. I mean, I wanted to be better. I wanted, I didn’t want to do drugs anymore. I was tired of the lifestyle. I was tired of just seeing how other people were in drug addiction. Like it’s tiring. It’s, it’s, um, it’s almost hopeless. I lived that life. You know what I mean? Like you wake up every day and you just.

 

Whitney (03:18)

Absolutely.

 

Tanya Morrison (03:19)

You know, you want to have a better life, but then you keep using drugs, then it’s like, when does it stop? It’s just every day, it’s just the same thing, different days. And I just, I don’t know, I wanted to have a better life. Because I remember having a better life. I remember, you know, I had a good life with my kids, and my kid’s dad . Heartache. Heartache, man, can really, um, can really, uh, how do I say this? I can explain it, it’s just like you can’t breathe, you know, and you just want to forget. You just want to forget.

 

Whitney (03:58)

Absolutely and so you had this decision then, you said about a year ago, and that led you to drug court and it had that means a little bit different programming.

 

Tanya Morrison (04:17)

I needed the structure. The hardest thing for me I think was admitting that I can’t get better without help. You know, I thought I was a functioning addict. And now, now today I realize I just, I don’t, no one wants to just function. They want to live. You know, I try to remember how I thought that, but I barely remember my days. The same thing over and over again. I thought I could cherry pick my life. You know, I could still use drugs as long as I go to work. I could still use, but it doesn’t work. It doesn’t work that way. You’re calling in sick all the time. You don’t show up because you know, you overslept. It doesn’t work. And that was really hard for me to admit that I can’t do this on my own. And for me, I need structure. I need the challenge. I think just the challenge of going to my programming, you know, going to work, being on time, all that, I just, I need that to get better. And it works. It does. I need to choose to do it. That’s what drug court does structure keeps me accountable for sure.

 

Whitney (05:28)

Yeah, That’s great. Right. And structure is particularly important for many people. I just certainly don’t want to say it works for everyone, but for many people at that beginning of recovery, when your chemicals are kind of rebalancing, you have to kind of, you know, restructure your day. What used to maybe revolve around use or thinking about use is now all this time and that can be a little overwhelming. Uh, so sometimes that structure can really kind of help whenever, like just be that there’s that guiding path.

 

Tanya Morrison (06:16)

I kind of compare it to just raising your children. You want your kids to grow up with structure, have a routine, do homework at this time, get home, do homework, have an hour of play. Having that structure helps kids grow up to be better adults. I compare my recovery to raising my kids. I taught them this and I should be able to do it myself. You know, this is me, my recovery right now is me telling my kids, because I mean, they’ve seen their dad, they now see me in like with my addiction. And I want, I’m doing this to show them like everything I taught them about structure growing up is, you know, I’m doing it in my recovery. It doesn’t have to just be raising a kid in everything that you do in life.

 

Whitney (07:08)

Absolutely. And now you have a big day coming up on Wednesday, a graduation. Can you tell us a little bit about that?

 

Tanya Morrison (07:20)

I’m very excited. I don’t know, I feel I’m getting certified to be a peer support specialist. I really feel like, like I said, I had a rough childhood. I didn’t really start my drug addiction until about six years ago, but I feel like because of my rough childhood, I almost feel like I was meant to have this drug addiction so I can know why people…who’s had a rough childhood, who’s been through abuse, sexual abuse, or just growing up with all that, why they become drug, why they use drugs to cover that up. For me, it was just heartache and the grief of breaking up with my kids’ dad and what I went through with that, that got me into drug use. But I understand now, I see both sides, so to speak. And…I don’t know, being a peer support specialist, I feel like this is like, it’s my destiny. Like it’s what I’m meant to do because I love helping people. Like it’s my, I just love it and I’m just excited to be a peer. I’ve said this from when I first heard about it, I’m going to be a peer support specialist and that’s what I’m going to do. So here I am.

 

Whitney (08:45)

That’s right. Just two days away from it being official, which is so exciting. And how would you describe peer support to someone who’s not familiar with it?

 

Tanya Morrison (09:02)

I would say it’s someone who is going to be open-minded, who knows your struggles, who knows what you know. They might not have the same trauma as you, but they know the feelings or the emotions behind those traumas. You know, someone that’s going to be there to encourage you and just give you encouraging words, but yet be honest enough to tell you when you’re doing what you’re not doing what you should be doing. You know? Someone that’s going to be honest, honest and encouraging at the same time. You know, I feel like, I don’t know, peer support should… It’s someone that’s going to be kind enough to tell you when you’re doing wrong and then kind enough to give you encouraging words. It’s just going to be there step by step with you. They’re not going to do the work for you, but they’re sure going to be there for you.

 

Whitney (09:55)

Right? The person has to do that work and yet having that guide can really be the deal, the thing that changes it from someone who’s been unsuccessful previously and then whenever they can have a peer, someone who’s been there kind of makes such a big difference, don’t you think?

 

Tanya Morrison (10:16)

It does. I got out of jail last year and I was at the arch. I just remember being so overwhelmed and having all this fright. Okay, I got to get a job. I got to get a place. I got to have three months to do it. I still got to go to programming. I was worried about missing my UA’s because we call this color hot. It’s like a UA hotline that you call it. It tells you your color. If they call your color, you got to go downtown to the courthouse and you know to a UA. All that was just, oh my gosh, like, you know, how am I going to do this? And I don’t know. I remember being so overwhelmed, but not having anyone there. Like, I know I had my PO and my counselor, but I don’t know. It’s just nice to have someone that has your lived experience and who knows what you’re going through. Say hey, you know, take it day by day. Every 24 hours counts for sure.

 

Whitney (11:21)

Absolutely. And yeah, you may have a PO or a counselor. They haven’t been through the pressure of, okay, you have to get in for your UA, you have to get the job, you have to do X, Y, and Z. And that, like you said, use the word overwhelming. And I think that is just something that people don’t recognize is how much is put on someone at a very vulnerable part of their recovery and then to have someone who’s like, yeah, I get it, been there. And I got through it. There’s hope, there’s inspiration and so what is the thing you are most excited about as you become a peer specialist?

 

Tanya Morrison (12:09)

Oh, what am I most excited about? Let’s just help that first person that I’m gonna help. I remember, I know how someone can lose themselves in their addiction. I’m excited about helping someone find themselves again and still deal with the changes that recovery brings. That’s what I’m excited about. Because for me, I’m very selfish in my recovery and I find that helping others helps me work on myself, if that makes sense. Like, so, and I work on myself so I can help other people. And this is definitely the job for me. I’m also very excited. I’m also very excited about where that first person invites me to, I don’t know, speak for them when they graduate from drug court,

 

Whitney (13:08)

That’s exciting.

 

Tanya Morrison (13:19)

I had an impact on him and I can’t wait for that day to happen. [laughter]

 

Whitney (13:25)

And I have no doubt that it will. That’s, yeah, that just being there. And when you help someone to accomplish something, I don’t know, in some ways it can be better than some of your own personal accomplishments.

 

Tanya Morrison (13:42)

I can already, like, I’m like, I can’t wait. I’m an emotional person.

 

Whitney (13:45)

[laughing]

 

So, you just said you’re an emotional person, but you also are clearly very genuine and caring. Is there anything else that people should know about you and what they could expect working with you as a peer?

 

Tanya Morrison (14:09)

I’m very blunt. Like you say I’m genuine and I am. Like I care for people. I’m sincere about it. You know? They can just expect when I say that I’m gonna do it, I’m gonna do it. I’m more… I show by action rather than talk. Like I’d rather tell you about it because I’ve done it. You know what I mean? I don’t like to say I’m going to do this, I’m going to do that and not do it. So I like to do it and they were like, hey, this is what I did. I’ll always, I’ll be there. You know, if I say I’m going to do it, I’m going to do it. That’s what they can expect from me. You know, you tell me what you need, I’m going to do anything and everything in my power to help you get to your next goal.

 

Whitney (15:02)

That’s wonderful. Step by step, yep. And you’ve mentioned you know your history with addiction. Are there any other life experiences that you will offer support for?

 

Tanya Morrison (15:03)

That’s all. Um, like sexual abuse and stuff like that? Is that what you mean? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Um, so my childhood, like, I don’t know. Children are the most defenseless people in the world. You know, when you’re a child and you go through abuse, you can’t really run away from that. You can’t. It doesn’t really matter.

 

Whitney (15:23)

Whatever, yeah.

 

Tanya Morrison (15:46)

They take you out of that home, they put you in foster care. It’s like it’s everywhere that you go and you can’t run from it. And it’s only when you become an adult and what you do about what happens to you, you know. I feel like I kind of counseled myself when I became an adult on my abuse. Instead of just totally going downhill and just being whatever, I guess it’s with having my kids kind of like grounded me. And I wanted my kids to have what I didn’t have. I wanted  to be the mom that…I wanted my mom to be with me. I guess it’s for women who have lost their children. I can help with that. Any emotional trauma you’ve been through, I got you. I guess is what I’m saying. I have a lot of empathy with people who have been through grief and loss and just abuse.

 

Whitney (16:49)

Yeah. Right.

 

Tanya Morrison (17:01)

You know, just a sense of like, I don’t know, I guess I could have lost myself with my abusive childhood, but I didn’t. I just, I know how it is. I know how it feels and I know the emotions people go through and I just, you know, let me help you. It’s so hard, it’s so hard. There’s still days I still wake up and I still think about back in, you know, back when I was a child and it’s like, you know, if you just, if you let yourself fall into those memories and…It’s really hard to get yourself back out, you know?

 

Whitney (17:48)

Absolutely. And here you are ready to help others get out.

 

Tanya Morrison (17:56)

Yes, yes, that’s the hardest thing is pulling yourself, like mentally pulling yourself out of your darkness. It’s so hard. It’s so hard, but you can do it.

 

Whitney (18:09)

Absolutely. And when people don’t know, you know, the invisible kind of injuries that we all carry with us, it can be very lonely.

 

Tanya Morrison (18:23)

You know, I have scars on my legs and I used to hide my legs. I wouldn’t wear shorts and stuff. And then finally I was like, you know what? I’m wearing shorts. I don’t care. Cause those don’t define me, you know? When I tell people, I say, if you could see the scars that you can’t see inside me, I’d be hideous. You know what I mean? And it’s just, I gotta hold myself up. Hold my head high and all that. I’m beautiful inside out. You know.

 

Whitney (18:56)

Absolutely, that’s right and, you know, there’s so much with recovery from addiction, but also with trauma, with involvement in the justice system that people judge. There’s a lot of opinions out there and there’s a lot of stigma. What would you like to say to someone or to just challenge stigma?

 

Tanya Morrison (19:27)

I don’t think it’s ever right to disrespect someone because of the mistakes they’ve made in their life, you know? For me, to challenge someone because of stigma, I would say, why don’t you try to see what they’ve done because of their mistakes. Your mistakes shouldn’t define you. It’s what you do about those mistakes that people should judge you on. We’re only human. People are going to judge regardless. I can only use myself as an example. I’m here having this interview with you rather than out feeding my addiction. So it’s just, I think people should look at what other, what someone is doing to better themselves rather than what they did, you know, to put themselves in prison or, now what they did is what they’re doing now, day by day.

 

Whitney (20:24)

Right. And for the person who’s listening to this and going through their own tough time right now, what would you like them to hear?

 

Tanya Morrison (20:38)

I would like them to hear. I want them to know that they got this. At the end of the day, no one’s going to make your choices for you but you. And if you want to get better, you have to make that choice to get better. You got to take that step. You can’t sit back and think about getting better because it’s not going to happen. I mean, intentions like this, you have to have actions to follow those intentions. You know, you can do it. You can definitely do it. It’s hard. And it’s lonely, because you have to have those boundaries. But you can do it. Those boundaries will save your life and you’ll thank yourself later for them. You’ll end up saying, hey, I like being alone. I like being sober. But definitely, no one’s got you but you.

 

Whitney (21:30)

I’m gonna go.

 

Tanya Morrison (21:38)

believe in yourself. You are enough. You are brave. You got this.

 

Whitney (21:45)

What a great message. Well, Tony, thank you for taking the time to share your story, for being willing to open up. It’s just wonderful to meet you.

 

Tanya Morrison (21:59)

I appreciate you. Thank you so much.

 

Whitney (22:02)

And for, no, absolutely my pleasure. And for anyone who’s listening and may be interested in receiving peer support services from Tony, just visit the link in our show notes. And if you enjoyed this interview, please share it with friends and family to help more individuals hear the remarkable stories of peer specialists like Tony. On behalf of Straight Up Care, thank you for joining us.

 

Tanya Morrison (22:03)

Thanks for having me.

 

 

Toni Morrison, Peer Support Specialist | Reduce The Stigma – Meet The Peer In this episode of “Meet the Peer,” host Whitney Menarcheck sits down with Toni Morrison, a Peer Support Specialist from South Dakota. Toni shares her powerful journey from battling addiction and facing legal challenges to embracing recovery and becoming a beacon of […]

Continue reading "Healing Through Helping: A Story of Recovery and Empowerment"
The word syndicate in red and the number 12 behind it. Syndicate 12 is a free online recovery resource and community.

A Free Recovery Resource and Community: Announcing Syndicate 12

Community. Connection. Recovery.

Jonathan Lewis, Co-Founder, Syndicate 12 and Co-Founder/CTO Straight Up Care

Have you been looking for a FREE, online recovery resource and community? Well, you’ve found it with Syndicate 12! Yes, you’ve read that right – a free, online recovery resource and community. It’s a virtual recovery community that provides the most valuable factor for mental health and substance use recovery – connection to others. The great minds behind Straight Up Care, the only HIPAA compliant telehealth platform that allows peer specialists to work for themselves, now brings another great resource for the recovery community in Syndicate 12. 

Watch Co-Founder, Jonathan Lewis’ interview and announcement of Syndicate 12 below or continue on to read about all the incredible features of the platform.

Click here for the episode’s full transcript.

Syndicate 12

How is Syndicate 12 a recovery resource and community?

Anyone who has experience with mental health or substance use knows that there are a lot of people out there who just don’t get it. Connecting with others who have been there is helpful, validating, and often a source of inspiration. Syndicate 12 provides a free, online social media space where you can connect with those who have similar lived experience. You can share openly, or take advantage of the ability to participate anonymously. All that matters is that you aren’t alone and you’ve got a community eager to support you.

How is it an online/virtual community?Picture of the Straight Up Care profile on Syndicate 12 demonstrating how you can build a community

Like other social media platforms, you can connect with those you know and those you build connections with. By adding friends, sharing posts, and meeting in the virtual meeting halls, you are building your own community of support from those with similar lived experiences.  You can post, share pictures, and earn points, all tracked and visible to your friends on your profile.

What’s the point of the points?

Did you catch mention of points above? Yes, all your activity on Syndicate 12 can earn you points (or lose you points if you violate community rules). The points can then be used to redeem a reward or to gift to others. The provision of points and rewards is an integration of contingency management. 

Rewards 

Rewards can be discounts, like a prescription card that gives you a percentage off the cost of your medications. Rewards can also be things like teeth whitening strips or a voucher for peer support services from a peer specialist on Straight Up Care‘s platform. 

Gift to Others

Have you ever wanted to do something for someone who helped you, but didn’t have anything to give? Now, with points on Syndicate 12 you can express your appreciation through gifting points. Maybe someone in the meeting hall took time to listen to your rough day, send them some points to help them build up to a reward they’ve been wanting. Or, maybe you see someone is having a particularly difficult time, so you send them points they can use to get a voucher for peer support services.

What’s a virtual meeting hall?

Auditorium with a lot of seats for community connection

Syndicate 12 offers multiple meeting halls: substance use, general, and mental health. In these meeting halls, you can connect with others. Whether you turn your camera, upload a photo, or create an avatar – the focus is on providing a safe space for you to connect with others. From each meeting hall, users can enter one-on-one rooms for more private chats, or into breakout rooms for group gatherings. Each hall also has a Celebration room, where you can celebrate good days, anniversaries, birthdays, and whatever else you want to celebrate! Come hang out and see what it’s like in a space dedicated to recovery.

What are the fun things for me to use with my profile?Daily journal with the ability to customize tags for easy tracking   

Life Journal

Sometimes it’s hard to recognize patterns or realize when we’ve been doing well because progress is often small and over a long time. To help you feel in control and able to celebrate the good and prevent the bad, Syndicate 12 offers the recovery journal. With an ability to create and customize tags, you can easily track what works, what doesn’t, and when you’re making great progress towards your goals.

List of actions you can take with your profile.Creating Abilities

Being able to express yourself and connect in multiple ways is a core purpose of Syndicate 12. Thus, all the different ways to create content – from memes to audio to polls to images, whatever is on your mind, there’s a way to express it. Ever wonder the most recovery-friendly gym in your area? Create a ranked list and have people vote! Wondering how many people are open about mental health struggles at work? Create a poll! There’s no limit to the connections that can happen on Syndicate 12.

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Reduce the Stigma Podcast

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Transcript

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (00:00)
I’m so excited for today’s episode, not only because I’m interviewing my friend and colleague, Jonathan Lewis, the co -founder and CTO of Straight Up Care, but also because Jonathan has a really exciting announcement that you’re not gonna wanna miss. So stay tuned and get ready to be inspired and get excited as we reduce the stigma.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (01:30)
Hello and welcome to Recovery Conversations. I am so excited for today because we have a special guest, my friend, colleague, boss, the wonderful Jonathan Lewis, who is the Chief Technical Officer for Straight Up Care. And we’re going to learn about him as well as share some really exciting news for everyone. But first, let me just say, Jonathan, thank you so much for joining me today.

Jonathan (01:58)
Thank you for putting this on for us today.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (02:01)
Yes, I’ve been bugging you for a while because I know how wonderful you are and I’ve been eager to share you with our audience. And so before we get to the exciting news, can we just first learn a little bit about, you know, you’re the chief technical officer and co -founder, I should say, I forgot that part, of Straight Up Care. Can you tell me and us what…

led you to partner with Dr. Mo and create Straight Up Care?

Jonathan (02:33)
Well, yeah, we actually were introduced…

two and a half or three years ago, it’s been a while. And, you know, we started working on a project and, it just kind of grew and grew and grew at first. It was just going to be a little like your run of the mill, telehealth platform where you can pick up the phone and call somebody. it has transformed into a lot more than that based on a lot of the tools that I had available, from a

programming side and all the tools that Dr. Mo had available from the teaching and educational side. And we’ve kind of just steamrolled it and we’re here now.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (03:23)
Yeah, and it’s such a great platform. I’m honored to be a part of it in any way. And just the opportunity it’s providing peer specialists and the barriers it’s breaking down both for peer specialists and for people who are seeking care. And I guess that kind of leads me to, was this an area that was significant to you or?

anything in particular that kind of highlights your involvement in the company.

Jonathan (03:58)
Certainly. Yeah, the whole recovery field. You know, I’ve either been on one side of the fence or the other since I was about 14 or 15.

I believe it was early 2000s, I worked for a state mental health department for strategic planning and prevention for anti -drug coalitions, more on the preventative side. And I saw the value of prevention. I saw all the good that you can do working in prevention.

but there is a big difference in, you know, the prevention side and actual helping people that need it immediately. and when I was working in prevention, it really, it, it was horrible for my recovery process, for my sobriety, because it, it felt to me that everybody I was working with, which was,

I think at the time I was overseeing a couple dozen counties, anti -drug coalitions of which, you know, the numbers were getting worse. Crime, prosecutions, drug, you know, drug charges increasing everywhere, like they do across the world. But I really took that to heart and, you know, it actually pushed me more into my addiction.

And I eventually resigned. but the whole idea of helping people never left. I knew that I had to get my act cleaned up before I could, you know, go and do anything further. So that’s kind of what I did. And that’s the long short route to how we are here today.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (06:03)
Yeah, thank you. And we’re all benefiting from your background and your skill set. And what you’re able to do is really incredible in giving already so many opportunities, but also connection. Connection is so important. We know in recovery, in life, we’re not meant to be isolated beings.

And so having that social connection is really important, which leads me to our exciting news. Can you tell us what it is that we’re launching next?

Jonathan (06:45)
Yes, we are right at kicking off a new platform we’re calling Syndicate 12. I’m very, very excited. And just to a brief overview, it is a platform for connection. It is absolutely free to hop on, to join, to build your connections, to build your core friends, your, you know, your Syndicate of 12.

obviously it doesn’t just have to be 12, but it is very much based on a different type of contingency management and it pulls together all of the community. very much like I was just talking about the coalitions, a coalition is kind of a grassroot effort where everybody comes to the same table, to work together on, you know, bettering the community.

And the same is true with Syndicate 12. We want, you know, the whole care system involved. It is a platform where you can stay completely anonymous and you can connect to people anonymously. We have live 24 seven video rooms open where you can hop on in a very new interactive kind of way.

Basically have a meeting anytime day or night.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (08:21)
That’s great. And getting to play around on it, you know, the anonymity for those who for any reason want to maintain that. You know, the interaction, there are video capabilities, but there are also really cool avatars that you can select to represent yourself. And really giving, at least from my perspective, really giving the person complete control over who they are in that space.

Jonathan (08:51)
Certainly. Yeah, the the goal was, you know, I understand that there are going to be people who want to remain completely anonymous. There are people who may want to make connections, whether it’s, you know, work or actual, you know, in real life friendships. But yes, we have a simple way that you don’t even have to upload your own picture. You can go in and create a avatar like you would, you know, assume, you know, change the hair, change the…

eyes, add glasses, add a beard, you know, whatever you want to do, make it, you know, uniquely you. but you can, you know, upload your own photo or if you want to pop on in video, you can pop on your camera and be there. But some people want to remain completely anonymous. Some people may want to use it to say, you know, Hey, I’m a, I’m a peer specialist and my name is, you can find me over here. It’s not a way to.

you know, just self promote. But the goal is to truly help people and incentivize that keep coming back, keep doing good things.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (10:04)
And so you mentioned the incentives, contingency management, and for anyone who isn’t familiar with that, contingency management in simplest terms is essentially rewards for achieving various accomplishments. So in the world of recovery, and I should also clarify, syndicate 12 is mental health and substance use. And so.

It would be maybe achieving certain goals that you set for yourself by engaging in the platform and really just continuing to feed your recovery. So with that basic explanation, can you tell us about the incentives? What could someone see as a result of their continued commitment to their recovery?

Jonathan (10:49)
Certainly. Yes, right now, as we are just kicking off, it’s not just incentives that we’re going to be giving.

Apparently we have everything from you can get a MP4 player to Bluetooth wireless headphones. And we have teeth whitening kits. There’s all kind of incentives just on the national. It doesn’t matter where you are, you can kind of benefit from that. But our goal is to use

You know, the people who are on the platform as kind of a brand ambassador. I used to do a lot in marketing. I still have a marketing company. And one of the things I saw most businesses really love the idea of, you know, these coupon sites. I think there are a few big ones, not to mention any names, but a lot of coupon sites.

actually caused a bunch of businesses to kind of go in the red for quite a while and bankrupt a bunch. With what we are planning to roll out, we want to have a map for every state, every location, and get that involvement from the local businesses. We’re going to train the people who want to be trained on how to approach businesses.

how to present the information and how to turn what some people would call a marketing budget into actually helping the community where a portion of that not only is a reward for coming back, whether it’s a coffee shop, they can actually say, if you have redeemed so many points on the platform, you can get a free coffee.

or something to that effect. But by doing that, you know, and most companies go out and say, Hey, you know, free coffee that cheapens their product. But as a reward, you know, it builds more of a value to that for the business side, but also it’s a little bit extra special for those who have been working for it. So from turning it from, you know, a.

special discount to actually helping. And, you know, someone who is involved in the community, someone who say, Hey, we’re a safe place that allow, you know, we’re welcoming towards those with substance use or mental illness. They are welcome here and we reward that. And a lot of the proceeds actually go to get the person who presents this to the business services.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (13:39)
right?

Jonathan (13:56)
and it doesn’t have to go directly to them personally. They get a voucher that they can hand out to people they meet in the video groups or friends or loved ones, but they can actually share that. So hopefully we can all get better.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (14:11)
That’s such an amazing community effort, right? So I could be in there, I could be gaining points, maybe I earned the voucher for services, and I’m in a good place at that time. But I see someone who’s struggling in my real life or in my virtual connection community, and being able to gift that. I mean, we…

How amazing, that makes me so excited to think about, we all want to be able to offer something to others and we don’t always have the finances or resources, but by doing things that are good for you, you’re going to be able to offer others both because you’re in a good place, but because you’re gonna through our platform get these rewards. And I just see the cycle of kindness and support that I certainly haven’t.

seen anywhere else.

Jonathan (15:12)
Well, thank you. Yeah, that’s, that’s kind of the goal. You know, if, if we can’t grow as a community, you know, or we’re kind of stagnant in the water and, you know, businesses, they can give their money to Google and Facebook and wherever they want to do. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, but if they just take one little percentage of that and reinvest in someone who is in their community, who, you know, is trying to do good.

And, you know, we’re not saying that they’re never going to slip again, but they’re going to keep coming back. And if we can just get them to keep coming back, keep taking good actions, you know, it doesn’t matter how many times someone slips at the end of the day, you know, are they going to be better or worse?

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (16:07)
Right, right. Let’s just keep providing the resources and opportunities for someone to be their most successful self, even when there are those slips along the way. That certainly resonates with my personal philosophy, which is probably why we get along so well. Now, the points. How does someone go about earning points?

Jonathan (16:24)
no.

Of course. Yeah, it’s one as simple as signing up. You get your first amount of points of which the amount of points that you earn just for signing up, you can immediately go and get a prescription card. Excuse me. I’ve been a little under the weather. I need a prescription card. And it’s your, you know, there’s a couple of companies that do it.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (16:53)
Heheheheh!

Jonathan (16:59)
The one that we offer it’s up to 80 % off your prescriptions. Even if you already have insurance You know, we we know that a lot of people in the community that’s Taking care of your health has been put on the back burner as I sit here just getting over a sickness myself, but No to have that available. I mean you can save up to 80 % on a prescription that you’re paying for anyways, it’s free to use you just

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (17:17)
Yeah.

Jonathan (17:29)
You know, show it to the pharmacist and they take money off. It’s fantastic. but to get more points, it’s, it’s everything from logging in every day from, like sharing the positive posts that we have. the philosophy behind that is if you’re sharing it to your social media sites, you know, that’s an embedding of who you are and what you’re doing. You have all of your social community.

Not really holding you accountable, but at least it’s on their radar to say, okay, well, trying to do good. If he slips, you know, we, we are there for him or her. but it’s, it’s doing that. We have, you know, points for, if you watch certain videos that are, you know, geared towards recovery or growth or, you know, a certain topic, you do get rewards for that.

For participating in certain things, we have a list of long stuff that you can get points for. We actually have a couple of things that can take points away as well. So, you know, we want it to be organic community. We don’t want to, you know, police it 24 7 and even to that effect we have, you know, if.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (18:42)
Hmm.

Jonathan (18:56)
If you report something that doesn’t need to be there and we find it doesn’t need to be there, you can get a point for kind of a self policing thing. but at the end of the day, the, the overall goal points, aside it’s if you show up, and are active in a community that wants to help. the neat thing is when.

We hop into our video rooms. One, it can be a big auditorium. We have a celebration room. You can, you can, you know, celebrate people’s wins. their recovery birthdays, all that kind of stuff, but a big auditorium, and little break off groups. There’s dozens of break off groups and they also have like one -on -one groups where, you know, it’s just you and one other person. No one else can hop in there and.

you know, hear your conversation. but it’s once you take a seat, that seat is full and you know, you can build these relationships with people and you can, you know, hear what other people have to say, hear other people advice. And one of the, one of the most beneficial ways to get points in my opinion, I’ve set it up where if someone helps you,

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (20:02)
Yeah.

Jonathan (20:23)
You can give them the points that you’ve earned just to, you know, thank you for doing what you’re doing. I really needed that today. Or, you know, you turn my life around. I know it’s, it’s hard to say here’s, here’s a thousand points for turning my life around. That seems kind of, underselling it, but I mean, there’s so many people out there who are every day meeting with people, helping people.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (20:32)
Yeah.

Jonathan (20:53)
And they don’t know if they’re appreciated or not. It’s, they may never see that face again, or they see them once a week and, you know, an hour long meeting and they really don’t know the impact that they’re making. There’s no real way to say thank you for that. and, you know, hopefully this will encourage people to keep helping and keep, you know, know that you’re appreciated for helping.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (21:17)
Yeah.

Absolutely incredible. There’s been so much more interest lately from, I mean, I think at the lived experience level, it’s always been there, but there’s more recognition, I should say, about putting the people with the lived experience in charge. And that’s exactly what’s happening here. And it’s giving them, like I said, opportunities, but also the way to…

support others, build others up, and have this almost like a current of recovery currency through the points where you can can do what you wouldn’t be able to do in the you know physical world of meetings and different groups and things like that because you’re not going to just give someone twenty dollars but you can give them twenty points towards their next you know achievement maybe they’ve been working towards

You mentioned teeth whitening, maybe that they really wanted that. That’s something that they have been looking forward to and you can contribute to that to help them achieve that thing that’s going to make them feel better. So it’s just such a wonderful community that you have built with the structure of Syndicate 12 and what we’re embarking on. And is there any other feature or component or purpose that we haven’t touched on that you’d like everyone to know?

Jonathan (22:51)
yeah, there’s, there’s a whole list of features that, you have to get in it. It may take another hour video. but what, you know, some of the just real off the top kind of things. One we’ve talked about the video rooms, which I think are fantastic and, you know, great, but we’ve built in a end to end encrypted journal. You can.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (22:59)
Hehehe.

Jonathan (23:19)
You know, it’s kind of a calendar journal where you can, you know, say today I struggled with this. I went to the park with this person and I did this and this and this, and you can color code it. So the goal is, you know, like any journal, I mean, you get a, you get a book journal and just write in it. That’s great. It’s hard to flip back to see, okay, well, I have, I have a whole lot more red dots.

back in the past and I have good, you know, green dots and it right now. So you can kind of see that, Hey, things are getting better because you know, me personally, it was, I just never felt like there was any, any real growth in my recovery process. And, you know, looking back, it’s like, yeah, today is so much better than, you know, even, even seven or eight years ago from now.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (23:51)
Yeah.

Jonathan (24:17)
But by having that journal, you know, it’s, it’s completely yours. Not even, you know, even if you were to break in the mainframe, you couldn’t access it because it is intent encrypted. but that is another great tool that is added in there. We have, for a little more anonymity, it’s kind of like a Reddit type posting and,

you know, response Q &A area. If you just have a burning desire and you know, you can get points for posting good questions and posting good replies there too. We let you actually build up a core group of friends, hence your own syndicate and you can have a private group inside of the actual Syndicate 12 platform. So if you already have a

a local, you know, anonymous group and you want to, you know, have a place to congregate, leave messages, you know, it is there built for things like that. Or if you just want to have a core group of your 12 that you check in with and hold each other accountable, that’s the idea. You have a group where you can get your Knights of the Round Table together and just watch everybody’s back.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (25:30)
Wow.

Yeah.

Amazing. Absolutely amazing. And how does somebody join?

Jonathan (25:54)
Yeah, all you need to do is go to syndicate12 .com and register. we will be launching a kind of a kickoff promo where you can get even more rewards. We’re going to have a little contest to, you know, encourage people to share and grow their community. and there’s a lot of different, just little fun interactive reward contest.

that will be kicking off just right off the bat.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (26:26)
That’s so exciting. I know I’m already on there and I’m ecstatic to see what everyone starts to share and the traction that we get within the community just because it gives back directly to the community. That’s the most important thing. So as we wrap up, if anyone listening was to only take one thing away from our discussion today, what would you want it to be?

Jonathan (26:58)
that we recover together and recovery is possible. That’s the main thing. It’s not about the tools we build or the websites we go to. It’s that people do recover. There is hope out there.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (27:18)
Thank you, Jonathan, so much for taking the time. I know you’re not feeling great. Having you on is such a pleasure, and I’m so glad everyone got to meet you and to hear about the exciting Syndicate 12.

Jonathan (27:34)
Whitney, I appreciate you. I appreciate all you do.

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (27:39)
Everybody go check out syndicate12 .com and start spreading the news because when you do that means that someone else is going to benefit for their recovery because as Jonathan put it perfectly, we’re in this together, we’re here to support one another. So let’s do this. Let’s get out there and build this community even more. Thank you everybody for listening.

Community. Connection. Recovery. Have you been looking for a FREE, online recovery resource and community? Well, you’ve found it with Syndicate 12! Yes, you’ve read that right – a free, online recovery resource and community. It’s a virtual recovery community that provides the most valuable factor for mental health and substance use recovery – connection to others. […]

Continue reading "A Free Recovery Resource and Community: Announcing Syndicate 12"
Two hands with glitter and streams and a floating heart with different symbols of peace, love, accessibility. Represents being able to create safe spaces for recovery mental health addiction by carrying it within you to offer others.

Safe Spaces for Mental Health, Addiction, and Recovery

Creating Safe Spaces, Reducing Stigma, and Fostering Support

The need for safe spaces surrounding mental health, substance use, addiction, and recovery continues to grow. While we have seen numerous stigma reduction efforts nationwide, there is still significant discomfort talking about these significant life experiences. This article will provide an overview of how safe spaces can be created in every environment and the necessity for the average person, not just healthcare professionals, to take action to make sure others have a place to go for help, support, or a listening ear free of judgment, punishment, or fear.

Understanding Safe Spaces

A safe space, in general, is a setting/environment in which a person can be their authentic self without fear of discrimination, harassment, or emotional harm. Safe spaces for mental health, addiction, substance use, and recovery, similarly, are spaces in which those topics are not judged, where the person is not shamed, and where empathy is abundant. There is intentionality in safe spaces – a deliberate effort to foster a sense of security, acceptance, and mutual respect. As a result, the person can be vulnerable and open about their experiences and needs. The majority of safe spaces are formal programs, but that limits the availability of support and acceptance to only those entities when we all could benefit from safe spaces everywhere. Truly safe spaces take into consideration the physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental safety of the person. This means thinking about images depicted, language used, noises heard, and resources provided. 

Benefits of Safe Spaces

Regardless of the nature of the space, safe spaces offer a variety of benefits that contribute to the overall wellbeing of an individual. When considered in the context of mental health, addiction, and recovery, these spaces may be the only place the person feels secure asking for help or expressing a need. Let’s look at three specific benefits of these spaces:

  1. Reduced Stigma and Isolation: We know that, sadly, significant stigma and shame continue to surround addiction, mental health, and recovery. This can lead a person to avoid acknowledging their needs and refraining from interacting with others out of fear of judgment or ridicule. By providing a safe space, we are sending the message that the person can be whomever they are without fear of repercussion. When there is a safe space, people are less likely to withdraw and isolate. And as we all learned from COVID-19, social isolation is extremely detrimental to wellbeing.
  2. Increased Access to Support: Let’s be clear – the role of a safe space is not solely to provide services, referrals, or references. The is so much power in simply existing as a place of acceptance. However, for those who are seeking assistance, the existence of safe spaces break down barriers to awareness of services and even accessing care.
  3. Empowerment and Self-Efficacy: When someone has a safe space to be themselves, their self-esteem improves. Perhaps while in that space, they’ll learn about a helpful resource, show kindness to another person, or experience a sense of pride for engaging in a space that embraces them. This can all contribute to an increased sense of empowerment and self-efficacy. Think about it, if you have become accustomed to being told, or the message implied, that you’re “bad” or “wrong” for an aspect of your life and then find a place of acceptance and empathy, wouldn’t you, too, feel empowered? That who you are IS enough, that you DO matter?

How to Create a Safe Space

Safe spaces can be offered anywhere, and should be everywhere. There are no physical building requirements for a safe space, sometimes all it takes is the ambiance of acceptance. Here are some ways to facilitate the provision of a safe space.

Physical Safety

  • Secure Environment: Ensure that the space is free from potential hazards. Create safety protocols to ensure the physical safety of the person. 
  • Address Potential Concerns: If someone is fearful of others hearing, take time to explain how conversations are kept private.
  • Accessibility: Provide ramps, elevators, accessible restrooms, and other accommodations to eliminate any discomfort or exclusion of the individual.
  • Cleanliness: Maintain a clean environment.
  • Amenities: Consider providing things such as water and healthy snacks. (Think about Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs)

Emotional and Mental Safety

  • Non-Judgmental Environment: You cannot simply say it’s non-judgmental, the actions and words of all in the space must demonstrate true acceptance and lack of judgment. Know the proper terminology and language to avoid accidental stigmatization. 
  • Supportive Atmosphere: Validate the person’s experience, don’t interrogate. Offer resources when needed and wanted.
  • Clear Communication: Don’t make an assumption that you know what they mean or that they understand you. Confirm what you heard and ask if they have any questions. Encourage open dialogue to prevent misunderstandings and conflicts.
  • Conflict Resolution: Promote a culture of forgiveness and reconciliation. 
  • Trauma-Informed: Be mindful of potential trauma experiences and possible triggers. 
  • Eliminate Stress: Create a calm and soothing environment. 
  • Encourage Self-Care: Empower the person to spend time taking care of themselves.

Spiritual Safety

  • Respect for Beliefs: Acknowledge and accept diverse beliefs. Avoid imposing your own. Ask thoughtful questions to take their beliefs into consideration.
  • Inclusive Practices: Provide the opportunity for their traditions and practices to be facilitated.
  • Holistic Recognition: Take into account the various components of spirituality.
  • Trauma-Informed: The person may have experienced spiritual or religious trauma – be attentive to and respectful of their engagement or lack thereof in spiritual activities.

Conclusion

Whether it’s a formal setting, an online community, or a park bench – we can make any space safe for individuals with mental health, addiction, substance use, and/or recovery experiences. Regardless of where we are, we carry within us the ability to provide a safe space by being empathetic and non-judgmental. If we all commit to making whatever space were are in safe, we will be making tremendous strides forward to ensuring all who want or need support are able to obtain it.

Looking for a safe space?

Connect with a peer specialist.

Visit Syndicate 12, an online environment designed specifically for individuals with mental health and/or substance use lived experience.

Creating Safe Spaces, Reducing Stigma, and Fostering Support The need for safe spaces surrounding mental health, substance use, addiction, and recovery continues to grow. While we have seen numerous stigma reduction efforts nationwide, there is still significant discomfort talking about these significant life experiences. This article will provide an overview of how safe spaces can […]

Continue reading "Safe Spaces for Mental Health, Addiction, and Recovery"

Managing PTSD and ADHD: The Power of Recovery and Facing Your Feelings

Melissa Saady, Peer Specialist | Reduce The Stigma - Meet The Peer

Melissa Saady Peer Specialist Virginia in a green shirt PTSD ADHD trauma recovery

Using her own experiences with PTSD, ADHD, and addiction, Melissa decided to channel her journey into a meaningful career. Melissa completed extensive training and obtained certifications as a Peer Specialist, equipping her with the necessary tools to make a difference in the lives of those she encounters. Melissa has always been driven by her desire to help others and her passion for providing support and helping others be successful shines bright in this interview.

Melissa’s Approach:

With her warm and compassionate demeanor, Melissa creates a safe and non-judgmental environment for individuals seeking support. She actively listens to their stories, offering a genuine understanding of their struggles. Melissa’s main goal is to empower others and guide them towards their own path to recovery.

The Impact of Melissa’s Work:

Through her work as a Peer Specialist, Melissa has touched the lives of countless individuals in Richmond, Virginia and across the US. She has provided invaluable support to those battling mental health challenges, helping them navigate the complexities of their journeys. Melissa’s dedication and expertise have earned her a reputation as a trusted resource in the community.

Click here for the episode’s full transcript.

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Transcript

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (00:00)

Today we’re revisiting our very first episode of Meet the Peer with Melissa Soddy. Melissa talks about the importance of facing our emotions and truly feeling them to work through to the other side. And she talks about the importance of self -love and having that internal strength and confidence to be exactly who you were meant to be, yourself. Stay tuned and be ready to be inspired as we continue to reduce the stigma.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (01:33)

Hello and welcome to Meet the Peer, a special series where we shine the spotlight on peer specialists. Meet the Peer is brought to you by Straight Up Care. With a mission to empower peer recovery professionals, Straight Up Care provides a multi-use platform and resources for peer specialists to share their lived experiences and build a positive connection with those in the recovery community. On this episode of Meet the Peer, we have Melissa Saady, a certified peer recovery specialist in Virginia.

 

Welcome, Melissa.

 

Mel Saady (02:05)

Hi, happy to be here.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (02:07)

Thank you so much for joining us. Can you share a little bit with me about your journey, your lived experience?

 

Mel Saady (02:15)

So I have been in recovery from addiction for six years now. Actually coming up on my six year mark in a couple weeks.

 

And this is something that while working in the field, I’ve learned this is a very common thing that happens is I had an injury where I broke several bones. And I was then prescribed painkillers from the doctors because, you know, that’s what you do when you have a severe injury and these painkillers flipped a switch in my brain. And then suddenly, suddenly I was seeking out.

 

all these substances and it just kind of snowballed from there and it was about a decade in active addiction and then about six years ago I got into recovery and I have always wanted to be able to help people in some way and in my

 

When I was younger, I wanted to be a teacher, a nurse, a therapist, something of that nature. And now that I’m a person in recovery, I’ve realized that lived experience as a person in recovery is so valuable because you can reach people in a way that other clinicians can’t really reach them. So. When I was.

 

staying at this recovery community organization, this place was run completely by peers. And that to me was very inspiring. Just seeing people like in a place, in that kind of position that were once where I was, was very inspiring. And I think that is one of the main goals of a peer recovery specialist is to be inspiration to those

 

who are in a place where they need a little bit of hope. So I love being able to be that person that helps fuel somebody’s hope.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (04:34)

That’s really exactly what a peer support is, right? I mean, you are interested in being a nurse, being a teacher, being a counselor, and all of those fields are pulled skills and passions are pulled into being a peer. And then that hope, can you tell me a little bit more about how peers can provide hope?

 

Mel Saady (04:43)

Great.

 

Mm-hmm.

 

Yes, hope. So that is kind of, that is one of the main things that peers do is they provide hope to people who are in need of that. A lot of people, when they come into treatment or when they’re seeking recovery or when they’re struggling with some sort of, when they’re struggling with some sort of mental, when they’re struggling, sorry, let me say that over, when they’re struggling with,

 

mental illness or substance use disorder, they kind of lose hope because it puts you in a very, it puts you in a really dark place where you kind of feel like there’s no way out. So you kind of, you often get stuck in these cycles of just repeating the same thing over and over again, even though you know it’s not really helping. And then when you see a peer who has walked the walk and they have

 

walked this path before you. So that’s kind of what the pier is there to do there. They’ve walked they’ve already walked this path. I’ve already walked this path and I can show you the way and I’m not I can’t do it for you but I’m going to walk alongside you while you’re doing it and cheer you on the whole way.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (06:20)

That’s very powerful to be able to have someone who’s there for you through such hard times.

 

Mel Saady (06:27)

Mm-hmm. It really is. And a lot of times that’s all somebody really needs is just to feel, feel like somebody cares about them. Um, really that’s also my needs is to feel like somebody cares about them and feel like they really support them. Cause sometimes, sometimes we get, we get in these places where we feel so disconnected from everybody. And really the

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (06:29)

in our

 

Mel Saady (06:54)

The opposite of recovery is not sobriety by definition. It is connection by definition. Connection is the opposite of addiction. So when you fill your life with support and connections of people who really care about you and care for your best interests, then that is how you work your way out of addiction.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (07:21)

So a peer can truly be that person who’s there to start that connection, be a strong, stable connection along the way.

 

Mel Saady (07:31)

Mm-hmm, exactly.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (07:34)

And you touched on your experience with addiction. What other experiences do you offer peer support for?

 

Mel Saady (07:44)

Other experiences that I have are…

 

Other experiences that I have are with PTSD. I have complex PTSD and also with ADHD, something that I’ve been managing for quite a while. And all of these things get so much easier once you take the substances away. That actually gives you the opportunity to really.

 

figure out what is going on within you instead of just drowning it out or numbing it out using substances. Because what I’ve learned is that when you are using when you are using something and it’s not always a drug or alcohol or some sort of substance right there’s so many different things that we can use to numb out. So when you’re using something to numb out

 

It may temporarily numb the pain, yes, but it does not make it go away. It’s always still going to remain there. So when you stop using things to numb out, that’s when you can really actually figure out what’s going on and work through it and just feel it through all the way together, all the way to the other side.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (09:10)

Right, right, really live through it in a different way.

 

Mel Saady (09:15)

Mm-hmm.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (09:16)

Is there anything people should know about your style as a peer specialist?

 

Mel Saady (09:31)

My style as a peer specialist, I would say I have a pretty wide ranging style. I don’t like to kind of keep myself in one little.

 

Hmm, trying to figure out how to say that.

 

My style is a peer recovery specialist.

 

would I would describe as

 

My style as a peer recovery specialist, I would describe as being pretty.

 

eclectic or dynamic, I suppose you could say. So I like to take from different pathways and really just cater to the needs of the individual. So whatever is resonating the most with them, that’s what I’m going to be there to provide for them. I do like to look at individuals holistically. So

 

I do, I believe a lot in holistic care, looking at a person as a, as a whole organism and not just as one symptom that they’re experiencing. Um, I also, I, I use, uh, faith based practices. I like to use mindfulness practices a lot. I’m really big on teaching, teaching folks about grounding techniques and just, you know, all the different kinds of

 

coping skills that you can use.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (11:25)

That’s great, really meeting the person and seeing what they need and what will work for them.

 

Mel Saady (11:26)

Yeah.

 

Exactly.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (11:35)

And there is so much stigma around substance use disorder, mental health. Uh, if you had only one thing you could say to challenge stigma, what would it be?

 

Mel Saady (12:03)

Keeping something in the shadows is how it thrives. So when we are afraid to talk about these kinds of things, that’s when they get really scary and really big and really dangerous. But if we’re able to actually just have a conversation, not be scared to bring it up, not be scared to tell people what’s going on, that lessens the power of it significantly.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (12:32)

Wonderful. And there’s going to be someone out there who watches this interview or maybe listens to it and they’re having a difficult time. What would you like them to hear?

 

Mel Saady (13:00)

I would like them to hear that there are people out there that care about you. There are people that care. Please don’t tell yourself that, that nobody cares about you or there is no hope because there are people that care about you and want the best for you. I promise that.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (13:20)

Is there anything else you’d like to share with us?

 

Mel Saady (13:33)

Oh, some other things that I’m very, some other things that I’m very passionate about are working with women and queer folks and working to empower them, help them feel empowered and themselves just feel, you know, more rooted within themselves and not, not feel the need to.

 

constantly get validation from somebody else to make sure they’re doing the right thing. Like I want you to be able to trust yourself. I’m also very experienced working in grief support settings. I have experienced a lot of loss in my life from a pretty young age. And so.

 

I know that, so I’m pretty familiar with grief and how grief affects a person’s life and can affect your mind, how it can trigger certain things like substance misuse and all kinds of things like that. And grief is one, another thing that there’s a lot of stigma around. People don’t really feel safe to just talk about it. Like if you’re…

 

If you’re really missing a loved one that just died, most people don’t feel safe to just talk about that with anybody. So I like to pride myself in providing that safe space for people to just open up about what’s going on with them.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (15:08)

for something that we all experience. We certainly don’t make it easy for people to talk about it. So that’s wonderful that you’re gonna be able to support people through those tough, tough experiences.

 

Mel Saady (15:23)

Thank you.

 

Whitney Menarcheck | she/her (15:25)

Thank you so much for joining me today. I am just so hopeful and uplifted knowing that you’re going to be there to support people. So thank you so much.

 

Mel Saady (15:37)

Thank you so much for asking me to be here today.

 

Melissa Saady, Peer Specialist | Reduce The Stigma – Meet The Peer Connect with Melissa Using her own experiences with PTSD, ADHD, and addiction, Melissa decided to channel her journey into a meaningful career. Melissa completed extensive training and obtained certifications as a Peer Specialist, equipping her with the necessary tools to make a difference in […]

Continue reading "Managing PTSD and ADHD: The Power of Recovery and Facing Your Feelings"
Swirls of chaos with pictures of different emotions and experiences to reflect the complexity of grief

Understanding Loss and Grief To Support Others

Loss and Grief: Experienced By All, Discussed by Few

I love discussing loss and grief. Yes, you read that right; I get excited to discuss two topics that most people avoid. The other night I had the privilege of leading a discussion among peer specialists about providing support for someone experiencing loss and grief and it was amazing. The reason I love discussing this topic so much is because of the incredible, positive impact you can have on someone if you can be present with them during their loss and grief journey. Many feel so alone in grief, but it doesn’t have to be that way. It shouldn’t be that way. Despite the fact that every human encounters these experiences, we, as a collective group, struggle to be supportive and understand what’s occurring. What follows is information meant to help raise awareness of the realities of loss and grief. There are various areas of thought on these topics, and what’s discussed below is not all inclusive and is heavily biased from my education and work in the field*. I’ve also included insights from some of the peers who participated in the discussion the other day. Hopefully this will spark a pursuit of further learning within you to strengthen your ability to support others through loss and grief.

*I am a licensed professional counselor in Pennsylvania. During her time providing direct care, I specialized in grief and loss.

Loss

Loss is the experience of being deprived of, or having taken away, someone or something meaningful. Yes, loss is not only the death of someone; loss occurs in more ways than most realize. Just a few examples:
  • Loss of certain dreams when you can’t continue school
  • Loss of childhood innocence for the child who witnesses violence, hears gunshots, experiences the pains of hunger
  • Loss of rights and/or freedom for the person who is convicted of a crime, even if they’ve served their “punishment”
  • Loss of physical ability due to injury, illness, etc.
While different, all forms of loss are equally valid and cannot be compared. Furthermore, loss is like a nick in the windshield, where the initial damage (loss) may be a certain size or impact, it can spiderweb to impact more and more. Many losses are not immediately realized by the person or those around them and some are never recognized by others. Loss denotes any event where there is a significant absence of something or someone previously integral to a person’s life or something that was hoped to be part of their life. It’s important to recognize that not all losses are sad. There’s an expectation that loss will result in feelings of sadness and despair, but that isn’t always true nor is it required. 
 
Loss of Control
As Peer Specialist Talynn Smykle- feeling a loss of control  encompasses everything that happens when you experience a loss. Losing something or someone can make us feel out of control and lead us to try and regain control, even if it isn’t the healthiest choice or best thing to do in the long-run. The sense of being out of control of our life, our world, can be extremely scary and should be recognized as a potential contributor to the grief experienced. 

Whenever there's a loss, in any way, shape, or form, it can touch your life in so many different ways that you didn't even think were important until it actually happens.

Grief

Grief is the emotional, physical, cognitive, and behavioral responses to loss; the experience of the loss. Even though it is a universal experience, grief is unique to each individual and how is presents can vary by loss, nature of the relationship, coping skills, previous experiences with grief, and so many more variables. For example, identical twin sisters could both experience the death of their father and have two completely different grief experiences. Because of how individualized grief is, it’s important that, when offering support to someone grieving, we never push what works for us or what we think is “best.”

“Normal” (Uncomplicated) Grief

The “typical” emotional, cognitive, and physical reactions following a loss. A relatively predictable pattern of acute distress that gradually lessons over time. This can include feelings of sadness, anger, guilt, anxiety, yearning, sleep interruptions, and appetite changes. The person gradually adapts to the loss and begins adjusting to their new life.

Complicated Grief

An extended grieving period that interferes with the person’s ability to function in daily life. There is difficulty or an inability to accept and adjust to the loss. The feelings described for “normal” grief are experienced at a greater extent – debilitating sadness, feelings of emptiness or meaninglessness, inability to engage in happy memories and stories.

Anticipatory Grief

Grief experienced before an impending loss. Mourning begins prior to the loss of someone or something. These feelings can include fear, anxiety, sadness, and a feeling of dread. This may help with the grief experience after the loss, and it may not. You may have heard someone say “it’s easier because they knew it was coming.” A loss is a loss, regardless of advanced notice or sudden occurrence. Anticipatory grief can itself be complicated and deserves as much support as post-loss grief experiences.

Disenfranchised Grief

When grief is not acknowledged or socially supported because of the nature of the loss or relationship. Examples include:

  • Death by suicide due to the stigma associated with stigma
  • Death of a former romantic partner 
  • Incarceration of a loved one
  • Infertility

Individuals may feel like they have to hide their grief or that their grief isn’t valid. This can lead to increased feelings of isolation and sadness. Because of the lack of social support and recognition of the loss/grief, healing can be challenging. Acknowledging and respecting the loss/grief is essential when providing support. 

A loss of life is a loss of life. This is a human life we're talking about.

Stages and Tasks

Stages of Grief

Many people have heard of Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’ theory of the five stages of grief. While significant, it’s important to understand that Kubler-Ross’ work was studying the experience of individuals dying and their grief experience, not the grief experience of those mourning the death. For that reason and others, this article will not be discussing the stages of grief. However, if it is a theory that helps you or someone you are supporting in navigating their grief, then embrace it and use what works for you/them. David Kessler, who studied under Kubler-Ross, has expanded upon her work in his book, Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. Marti described this book is extremely impactful and beneficial, so I take that as a great recommendation. To learn more about the stages of grief, you can visit grief.com.

Tasks of Mourning

I personally prefer William Worden’s Four Tasks of Mourning, as it is less linear, more culturally inclusive, and places the person grieving as more active in their grief rather than passively having grief happen to them. Unfortunately, there isn’t a verified source of Worden’s work online, but a helpful resource can be found here. It’s important to understand the tasks are not linear, although they are numbered. Instead, a person can revisit tasks, experience multiple at the same time, and have the tasks recur in the future. I personally prefer this model because it better reflect the fluidity of grief and how, in many ways, it is a life-long process and experience. While Worden’s tasks were specifically for grief following a death, they can be applied to any type of loss. The following information is all based on Worden’s book, Grief Counseling and Grief Therapy.

Four circle venn diagram with William Worden's Four Tasks of Mourning

Task 1: Accept the reality of the loss

The person comes to a place of recognizing the permanency of the loss. Difficulty with this task can look like denial, disbelief, magical thinking, etc. (complicated grief).

Task 2: Process the pain of the grief

Perhaps the component of grief that makes others the most uncomfortable. We cannot ignore the pain, the emotions, the thoughts. The harder we try to ignore them, the stronger and more overwhelming they will be whenever they get their chance to break through. Sitting, not speaking, not trying to “fix” anything, just sitting with a person in their grief can be the most significant act of support we can offer. Many supporters may believe that talking about the loss will be more painful. In reality, the person is going to be thinking about the loss regardless of you bringing it up, what you can offer them is a safe and supportive space to have those thoughts, recall those memories, laugh about jokes, etc.

Task 3: Adjust to a world without the deceased

We see a timeline set on grief through a predetermined allotment of bereavement days. In reality, grief is, in many ways, truly kicking in when the rest of the world “moves on.” Dependent on the loss, there can be a significant impact on the day-to-day of the person. A new way of existing in the new world, a world without the person or thing that was lost, must be developed. Difficulty in this process can appear as someone who isolates to the extent of not leaving their house, never returning to work, demonstrating poor hygiene, etc. (complicated grief). Marti Blose, Certified Peer Counselor, perhaps said it best, “grief and loss necessitates the word change and we don’t like change very much. we really hold on to the things we can. and when loss is experienced, that always in some way necessitates change.” 

Task 4: Find an enduring connection with the deceased while embarking on a new life

The loss of someone or something does not erase the relationship or the meaning of the entity in a person’s life. That person or thing still holds meaning, it will just be in a different form after the loss. This can look like a nonprofit being started to address a loved one’s cause of death, or a commitment to take certain actions moving forward. The form of the connection doesn’t matter, what matters is that the person feels the connection. 

The same tree in two different pots to demonstrate that we adjust to a new world and find a way to continue growing and living after loss

Receive support for your grief/loss

The following peers were either mentioned above or are peers who offer grief support.

Talynn Smykle Peer Support Specialist

Talynn Smykle

Belinda Ennis Peer In Training

Belinda Ennis

Melissa Saady Certified Peer Recovery Specialist

Melissa Saady

Loss and Grief: Experienced By All, Discussed by Few I love discussing loss and grief. Yes, you read that right; I get excited to discuss two topics that most people avoid. The other night I had the privilege of leading a discussion among peer specialists about providing support for someone experiencing loss and grief and […]

Continue reading "Understanding Loss and Grief To Support Others"
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